2018 was filled with crazy for me and for those around me.  I feel it, they feel it, we all feel it.  But I think it's important to find balance because whether it's "good" or "bad" things, these "things" are moments we need to reflect on to catch up mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and physically.  I think that's why I pushed myself to write more because that forces me to stop, think, reflect, and write.  Similarly, I love taking baths because I'm forced to sit and just take a moment away from the outside.  Also, a cup of coffee or latte always makes me slow down as I wait for the brew to cool over and I can take sips and enjoy the taste and aroma. 

I'm hoping to stay focused for the last 36 days of the year on the following:  

1. My Health.  

I have been avoiding the gym like the plague for the last few months, and especially since I started my new job.  The mental, emotional and spiritual strain led me to believe the physical strain would just add on.  But in reality, I think it was the way I think about the gym that made me believe it would just add on to my strained state.  I'm a very competitive person and if I don't feel like I'm improving, then why do it, or there must be a better way or different route.  I love to lift weights because I'm good at it and I see myself improving by adding weights to my routine.  But if I'm not adding weights, then I'm stagnant.  However, there's a mental health factor to going to the gym: it makes me feel good.  So is it really helping me to think of the gym in this manner and then not going all together?  Definitely not.  So yesterday, I told myself "Just do whatever my body feels like doing, and the rest will come."  I walked on the treadmill for 15 minutes, did light ab exercise for about another 15, then some light/minimal arm/back/shoulder exercises and then stretched the rest of the time to Christmas music.  I felt good and I did it!  I went to the gym after 6+ months of heavy avoidance.  I am definitely learning to change my mind set and train myself to do what's healthy and good for me versus adding on to this strain that I've felt for some time now.  It really felt accomplishing and I hope to keep up this "stay healthy but don't over do it" mentality. 

2. My Financials.

I'm so fortunate to be in the place that I am and to be able to enjoy certain luxuries as well as have many things.  I don't mean to complain and take this for granted.  But I genuinely am nearing 30 and talking about the typical debt some of us are stupid enough to fall for.  Marketing fucking works.  It makes you want things.  If you already have things, then it makes you think you want the exact same thing that looks slightly different.  It's shinier, and new.  I fell into heavy credit card debt up until this year, and I'm so lucky to be able to get out of it.  However, I still find myself thinking I want/need and deserve something.  I definitely go through that whole "I've worked hard, I deserve it, #TreatChoSelf" pep talk.  But in reality, I'm giving someone else my hard earned money while I could be spending towards the luxuries I actually would enjoy much better like a massage, a spa day, etc.  I want to pay off student loans and my car as well as obtain a house and these are big ticket items that cost big money.  I literally have all the shades of lipstick I'd ever need so why buy more?  I literally have my favorite facial items that I haven't even finished, so why buy more?  I use probably 5% of the make up I own on a daily basis, and probably don't even touch 50% of it since I first got it (either as a gift or a a purchase).  Yet these marketing tactics and my mental "I need/want this" gets the best of me.  I found myself going to Sephora and teling myself a lipstick color is already very similar or I have it and I don't need a similar version or any more.  It was a very proud moment, and I hope to keep this up.  I want to make financially sound decisions and chip in more with any finances that comes our way, and just not be worried.  Gunning for these goals at full speed and I know I'm improving by the day.  I've already mapped out plans and timelines so I am smarter about my financials.  Now it's just about keeping myself in check on my spending and making sure I stay in line.         

3. My Work.

I'm still experiencing the learning curve of being a part time professor at a community college and it's taking a toll on me big time.  But I also need to find a healthy way to cope, reflect and deal.  Similarly, I've been doing part time work which isn't the worse.  But I think it's time to buck up since I've caved to my emotional and mental well being for the last few months, and it's time to put in work to try to earn more rather than do nothing during my free time, and just plan out my time better.  I'm not quite sure what this additional work will be, but I'm hoping to just make more money and save it towards the above goals.  Just gotta figure out what that side hustle will be.  The break will be a good time to reflect on the past semester and my next moves and I'm honestly excited about this. 

Obviously, there's a plethora of things I could focus on, but I'll keep it at these main three for now based on how the last few months have been.  I think it's important to narrow your focus so that you set yourself up to suceed.  Yes there were lots of ups and downs of this past year, but there's also still so much potential for growth and learning.  I'm excited and hope if you're reading this, you're able to finish the year strong as well!