I’ve been on hiatus for a while and I don’t really have much of an explanation.  Lots have happened and I think I needed more time to wrap my head around it all.  

This year, I’m over going out of my way to pleasing others.  From family, friends and acquaintences, I’m okay with putting me at the center of my focus and letting everything thing else fall in place.  I don’t need nor will I move mountains to please others. 

I’ve learned to respect myself and only give effort to those who do the same.  Usually, if people constantly ask me for a favor or help of any kind, I would move mountains to make it a yes.  But if I notice I’m only getting “no’s” in return, then I’m going to pull back and step away from those relationships.  Why should I put my all towards something that another person is giving me less than that in return?

I didn’t realize this had anything to do with self-respect.  But it wasn’t until I constantly fell into bad relationships whether it was romantic, friendly, or family, that I learned this has all to do with self-preservation and self-respect.  Staying in those relationships, giving in to all their whims, means you’re allowing and telling them it’s okay to mistreat you and undervalue you.  It’s telling others, it’s okay if they treat you like the same toxic relationship is mistreating you.  It has to stop somewhere.  

I’m not trying to sabotage anyone else and do any harm towards anyone.  I just won’t place you at the center of my focus and my life.  I can’t and I won’t.